Published: April 05, 2015 | Plano, TX
Toyota unveiled the first driverless car Thursday capable of committing a hit-and-run.The new autonomous vehicle is able to accelerate from zero to 60 miles per hour within five seconds of sensing the damage it has caused to another automobile.
According to engineers, the driverless car features an advanced Culpability-Evasion System, which rapidly utilizes front, side, and rear-mounted cameras to determine whether the other vehicle involved in the collision sustained any visible scrapes or dents and survey the area for eyewitnesses. Technicians confirmed that the self-driving vehicle’s onboard computer calculates within several microseconds of the crash if its own actions are to blame, and if it finds it is at fault, it then initiates a strategy to floor it and speed onto a major roadway before the police arrive.
“This vehicle’s onboard computer can instantaneously make judgment calls, like whether that nick in the sports car it just struck was already there, with an incredible level of accuracy”
David Conroy, an automotive consultant on the project.
Saying the vehicle’s automated hit-and-run ability represented the culmination of years of effort, Toyota sources explained that the car had experienced a number of setbacks in early development, including its repeated failure to desert the scene of even small dings, scratches, and rear-end impacts.
Members of the design team told reporters that the innovative autonomous car, which relies on a system of sensors and sophisticated algorithms to provide it with a split-second reaction after being involved in a collision, has successfully demonstrated the capacity to immediately flee the scene of an accident to avoid legal repercussions without any human intervention.
Hoping to build on their initial success, Toyota engineers confirmed they were very close to programing the self-driving car to aggressively pursue an asshole motorist who cuts it off in traffic.
Source: The Onion